Dear Doctors Beasley,
My family is scared to death of tornados! My husband recently transferred to Oklahoma from Washington, D.C., but we have seen the pictures of tornado damage on the national news. How do people in Oklahoma live with the potential of being hit by a tornado at any time? But more importantly, how do we help our three-year-old twins handle their fears?
Carley and Ed
Dr. Lori: Welcome to our state! Your concerns about our weather are not unusual and are shared by a lot of native
Oklahomans as well as newly relocated citizens. Remember, fear is contagious. It spreads rapidly from spouse to spouse, parents to children, and among the population in general. For example, look at the fears about our economy these days. If you are frightened as parents, your will communicate your fears to your children no matter how well you think you have masked them. As parents, we set the example for children. It’s important that we
remain calm before, during and after severe weather thereby communicating that no matter what happens, we can handle it.
Dr. Stewart: You would do well to become informed about Oklahoma’s weather. Knowledge is power, and the more you know about a fearsome object, the less intimidated you will be. Accompany your twins to the library and check out age appropriate books on clouds, storms and weather in general. However, don’t be tempted to check out or buy videos of tornadoes. Those scenes can be terrifying to young children. Also, you can educate yourself about Oklahoma’s early warning systems that make tracking potentially threatening weather a true science.
Dr. Lori: We recommend a field trip with your children to the National Weather Service facility on the University of Oklahoma campus to see how people are working to keep us safe during times of turbulent weather. You can get information on tours (which require an advance reservation) at srh.weather.gov/oun. Their website also contains information on weather safety.
Dr. Stewart: In your previous home you probably participated in disaster drills of some sort. Fire drills are common, earthquake drills are required in areas highly prone to earthquakes, and in this part of the country, we have tornado drills. On a calm leisurely day when the weather is nice, sit down with your children and lay out a plan for bad weather. Find the safest place within your home and designate that place as the official “Family Safe Place.” Practice going to the safe place and also discuss where to meet in the unlikely event the family gets separated during a storm.
Dr. Lori: Stock your safe place with a few toys and stuffed animals, books, snacks, bottled water, a first aid kit,
flashlights with spare batteries, a change of clothing for each family member, hard-soled shoes in case you must walk in debris, bicycle helmets and/or other protective head gear for each person, battery operated TV and/or radio with spare batteries, and a special place for the family pets. Make stocking the safe place a family activity and remain calm and encouraging while doing so.
Dr Stewart: We also recommend limiting your children’s exposure to televised images of disaster scenes. Even though a tornado may have done damage hundreds of miles away, a three-year-old’s concept of distance and mileage places the danger very close to her. One tornado shown over and over—even if it’s just from different perspectives—constitutes another tornado in your child’s mind. Be reassuring, calm and nurturing when answering your children’s questions at their level of understanding.
Dr. Lori: If you ask Oklahomans who have lived here all their life, most will tell you they have only seen a tornado on TV or from a distance. An actual encounter with a twister is rare and hopefully that will be the case for you also. Thank you for writing.
Lori Beasley, EdD is Asst. Vice President of Academic Affairs and Professor of Family Life Education at the University of Central Oklahoma. Stewart R. Beasley, PhD is a licensed psychologist who practices in Edmond and Oklahoma City and is Clinical Professor of Psychiatry & Behavioral Sciences at the University of Oklahoma
College of Medicine.
Do you have a question about early childhood issues for the Beasleys? E-mail it to SRB@DRStewartBeasley.com.
Editor’s Note: Go here to view a video featuring KFOR’s Mike Morgan discussing severe weather safety tips with kids.