by Mari Farthing

Modern families come in all shapes and sizes. Despite their differences, most parents want their children to have the best education possible. Though opinions may vary on what constitutes a good education, all can agree that the way our children are taught today helps shape their lives—and creates the future for us all.

Recent studies show that what children learn during the toddler years (ages one to three) will significantly impact their lives. Nurturing care with consistent caregivers and a focus on simple and positive values can make a huge positive impact on children. LifeWays North America began in 1998 as a pilot project offering childcare focused on the basic routines of a healthy home life and has since expanded into a multi-service organization providing consulting, training, and seminars for parents, child care providers, and anyone involved in raising children. LifeWays is a philosophy of living that many parents and child care workers embrace.

LifeWays grew out of the Waldorf Education method, an educational system for school-aged children from Kindergarten through eighth grade. Waldorf focuses on maintaining consistent caregivers for children to create long-term emotional bonds, the natural rhythms of the outside world (nature and seasonal festivals) and the inside world (domestic and creative activities within the home) in an environment that includes adults and children of many ages to encourage healthy social development. LifeWays and Waldorf are sister organizations which share an understanding of child development.

Some LifeWays Principles
• Children will thrive with a consistent, devoted caregiver during their early years.
• Normal daily rhythms are the most important teaching tools for toddlers. Children can learn from the normal cycles of meals, play, rest, household chores, and social interaction.
• Children need a safe environment where they are free to move around and play with toys that encourage their imaginations.
• Children receive positive stimulation from being outdoors to experience nature in all kinds of weather and from making music and singing.
• A home-like atmosphere, including children of all ages and a dedicated caretaker, encourages children by providing an atmosphere in which they feel appreciated and valued.
• The caretakers of children need to be recognized and appreciated for the important work they are doing.

Though LifeWays is a new approach, it utilizes old-fashioned ideas for what children need to succeed. Modern conveniences that most of us rely on—such as television and electronic toys—are frowned upon. Instead, LifeWays recommends “open-ended” toys that can become whatever a child imagines. Because children have a natural curiosity and want to be involved in what their caretakers are doing, LifeWays focuses on using domestic activities such as gardening or cleaning up after a meal as ways to involve children in home life.

Spending time outdoors is also a key belief in LifeWays. “Children thrive in and need nature,” states Cynthia Aldinger, a Norman resident and one of the founders of LifeWays North America. “For every hour a child spends in exposure to television, video games, or computer time, they need from two to three hours of outdoor time to help restore a balance.”

Alanna Ireland, a Norman mother of three, saw the positive impact of LifeWays theories after she started attending a playgroup lead by Cynthia. “We enjoyed the playgroup and began to implement some of the principles in our home life,” Alanna says. “We started doing the same things in the same order every day. The children would play alongside me and I would do domestic tasks—they could join me if they wanted to.” Their day also included time for structured music and art projects, and unstructured play time. “We cut out a lot of television and I did away with many of the more mass-marketed toys. I started providing them with simpler toys, so that more of their play was coming from their own imagination. I found I was a lot happier being a stay-at-home mom and my kids were actually better behaved. It just really sold me on the whole idea.”

Alanna, who is working toward a degree in Early Childhood Education at OU, was so impressed with LifeWays that she will soon be opening Oklahoma’s first LifeWays home daycare. “Once I got involved with Cynthia and understood what LifeWays really was, I decided that would be the best thing for me.”

According to Cynthia, the focus on domestic life is not about teaching children to do chores or giving up our modern lives, but a reminder of “the qualities of those activities that happened out of necessity.” LifeWays is not about returning to the values of our ancestors, or going back in time. It moves forward, using what we have learned and how our lives have evolved to garner a new appreciation for the simpler things in life.

LifeWays Endorsed Toys
• Infants: simple toys, such as a wooden rattle or a small cloth, placed where baby can reach out and discover them, encourage large muscle movement.
• Early toddlers: anything can be a toy! Things that stack (cups or blocks) and containers with lids are good choices. Toys that move, like balls or rocking horses, are also appropriate.
• Later toddlers: kids learn how to play with each other and like toys that imitate what they see mommy and daddy doing at home—kitchen fun and dress up. Puzzles and musical instruments are also great fun.
• Pre-schoolers: these kids use their imagination to make simple objects, such as a piece of wood, into a specific object, like a telephone handset.

Learn More About LifeWays

• Failure to Connect: How Computers Affect Our Children’s Mind—and What We Can Do About It, Jane M. Healy, 1999.
• Evolution’s End: Claiming the Potential of Our Intelligence, Joseph Chilton Pearce, 1992.
• Magical Child: Rediscovering Nature’s Plan for Our Children, Joseph Chilton Pearce, 1977.
• Building Healthy Minds: The Six Experiences That Create Intelligence and Emotional Growth in Babies and Young Children, Stanley I. Greenspan, M.D., 2000.
• The Irreducible Needs of Children: What Every Child Must Have to Grow, Learn, and Flourish, T. Berry Brazelton, M.D. and Stanley I. Greenspan, M.D., 2001.

Mari Farthing is the assistant editor of MetroFamily Magazine and lives in OKC with her husband and two young children.